Heroes' Feast: A D&D Cookbook for your adventures

For days, the weather outside has been enough to make anyone lose the desire to step a foot out of the house. So, I stoked the fireplace, got comfortable, and opened the book I’d been promising myself to properly leaf through for several evenings.

The familiar scent of paper hit me immediately. I’ve always loved it, but this book smelled even more intense. As if it knew exactly how many diverse aromas were hidden within its pages. I slowly turned the thick, sturdy leaves, admiring the beautiful illustrations and food photography. It was clear that someone had put real effort into crafting this book.

On the first page, I was greeted by a feast I would have gladly accepted after today. And the following pages were no worse. Humans, elves, dwarves, and halflings clearly know how to treat themselves to good food.

Elves, in particular, are quite particular about their dining. Their tables groaned under bowls of various delicacies, and the scent of fresh herbs mingled with the sweet aroma of fruit. One of the elves offered me a goblet of wine, which I naturally didn't refuse. It was light, pleasantly sweet, and smelled of fruit. Elves pride themselves on fresh ingredients and careful preparation, and it showed in their dining. No one was in a rush; courses followed in a leisurely pace, and every bite received almost ceremonial attention.

A few pages later, everything was quite different. Instead of delicate flavors and refined dining, I was met with hearty portions, substantial meals, and full tankards of ale. Dwarves clearly hold the opinion that good food should primarily fill you up. And judging by the amount of meat that appeared before me, they took that principle very seriously.

I ran my fingers along the edges of the pages, letting them flip quickly under my thumb. Among the pictures of various dishes, a bowl of thick chili caught my eye. That was exactly what I wanted in this weather. A proper portion of hot, fragrant food that warms you to your very fingertips.

The scent of fried onions wafted from a large cauldron over the fire. Standing before it was a massive figure who had just tossed a spice blend into the pot. A pungent cloud rose from the sizzling cauldron, and I immediately started coughing.

The figure turned toward me. Only then did I notice how menacing he looked.

"Excuse me, are you preparing halfling chili?"

"Archan's chili," he growled.

"Excellent! I have your recipe right here. Could I see how you prepare it?"

He didn't answer, but as he turned back to the cauldron, I stepped closer. Archan poured broth into the pot, stirred the mixture thoroughly, and added tomato puree. I paused and checked the recipe again. It says tomato paste here. Before I could think about it more, Archan looked around.

"Where is the meat?"

"Turkey?" I asked, running my finger down the ingredient list.

Archan turned to me sharply.

"Halfling!"

"Well, it says turkey here," I countered, showing him the recipe.

He snatched the book from my hands. His gaze darkened.

"That is not my chili!"

"But it is. Look, your name is even here."

Archan roared in anger and swiped at me. I barely managed to jump aside. Before I could recover, he snapped his fingers, and a small draconic creature rushed at me from the hearth.

The dragonling charged straight at me with bared teeth, and I frantically looked for something to defend myself with. I grabbed the first thing at hand. At the last moment, I swung a wooden spoon in front of me, and the dragonling bit down on it.

I gripped the handle tightly, and we began to tug at the spoon furiously. The dragonling growled, refusing to let go of its prey. Finally, I yanked the spoon hard to the right, and the creature flew several meters away, albeit with a good chunk of the spoon still in its mouth.

With the chewed-up spoon in hand, I began to retreat from the enraged Archan, who had meanwhile moved dangerously close. I backed up until I hit the table with my spine. Several strange crystals tumbled to the ground and rolled across the floor. Archan didn't notice them and stepped firmly toward me. Suddenly, the stones glowed, arranged themselves into a circle, and magical flames erupted around the dragon warrior.

Archan tried to break through the wall of fire, but the flames drove him back every time.

For a moment, I stared at the glowing circle in disbelief. Then, I cautiously returned to the cauldron. Now, all that remained was to add the turkey and let the chili simmer slowly so all the flavors could meld.

I scooped a hearty portion into a wooden bowl, sat down, and plunged my somewhat shortened spoon into it. The taste was excellent, full of bold spices, but a moment later, my mouth started to burn intensely. This was perhaps even hotter than the teeth of Archan's dragon pet.

A log crackled in the fireplace. I leaned back comfortably in my armchair. The chili was warming me from the inside so thoroughly that I began to doubt I even needed to add more wood.

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